The Ages of Giraffe
Aug. 14th, 2012 11:56 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
In listening to NVC trainings, I often hear the phrase "baby giraffe" to describe a person just learning the feelings/needs jargon and the "Are You Feeling _____ because you need _____?" framework. I think there's more to it than that- baby giraffes are in the process of learning how to relate to their needs from a perspective of generosity rather than weakness.
Today, I heard a new phrase- "teenage giraffe." Sometimes, the teenage giraffe gets it right, and can delight in his or her growth and freedom. On the other hand, there's the obnoxious teenage giraffe. I imagine they're the ones who "assert their authenticity*" at all costs. After years of repressing yourself from sharing freely with others, I can see how over-expressing is a step that helps one break the cycle.
I imagine teenage giraffes are also the ones who yearn to share NVC with the world, but are still a little ungainly in its execution. Sadly, these teenagers can turn folks away from NVC.
Well, I'm proud to be a teenage giraffe. I think I might use this week to explore what it would mean to "assert my authenticity" at all costs. It doesn't mean I have to A my A, but I can create thought experiments about what might happen if I did.
*I put this in quotes because I'm not sure what it means. I imagine it means always stopping people when I get bored with what they say, or interject my feelings and needs without considering how their reactions to it might feed or not feed me. Those are important skills that I need to develop (well, interjecting my feelings and needs, but I don't want to develop not-consideration).
Today, I heard a new phrase- "teenage giraffe." Sometimes, the teenage giraffe gets it right, and can delight in his or her growth and freedom. On the other hand, there's the obnoxious teenage giraffe. I imagine they're the ones who "assert their authenticity*" at all costs. After years of repressing yourself from sharing freely with others, I can see how over-expressing is a step that helps one break the cycle.
I imagine teenage giraffes are also the ones who yearn to share NVC with the world, but are still a little ungainly in its execution. Sadly, these teenagers can turn folks away from NVC.
Well, I'm proud to be a teenage giraffe. I think I might use this week to explore what it would mean to "assert my authenticity" at all costs. It doesn't mean I have to A my A, but I can create thought experiments about what might happen if I did.
*I put this in quotes because I'm not sure what it means. I imagine it means always stopping people when I get bored with what they say, or interject my feelings and needs without considering how their reactions to it might feed or not feed me. Those are important skills that I need to develop (well, interjecting my feelings and needs, but I don't want to develop not-consideration).